1st LEAGUE vs Parkview

Kelvin won 3-2

Francesco lost 0-3

Mwansa lost 0-3

No number 4 as Gareth is away and Stan is injured (will this cost the league)

Overall result: Lost 3 - 14

4th A vs Dainfern

Vevek went on first against Gary Cummings, dropped one game for a relatively easy 3-1 win.

Dave then went on to play Lucy Clarkson, won a well contested 1^st game against a  very determined opponent, Dave then stepped-up a gear to win the next two easily against a very frustrated and disappointed opponent.

Chris then played Andre le Roux with Chris not yet completely recovered from a bout of Flu, got to the 5^th game and then clawed his way from a seemingly impossible position to have match point at 15-14, and then gifted the match to his opponent by playing a few loose shots.

Flip was last against Harold, unfortunately his opponent pulled his hammy in the first game and retired to give Flip his best win of the season 3-0.   

Overall result: Won 14 - 4

4th B (DEFINITELY NOW IN NAME ONLY) vs Alberton

So, despite my appalling captaincy performance against Dainfern a few weeks ago, our illustrious leader, captain and chairman decided the best thing to do was to drop me against the upcoming Alberton match and to drop himself at the same time (well it was gonna be a tough match) and coach me in the skills of squash and man management and thereby groom me for further captaincy duties in the future. Clearly he had seen things in me that I didn't realise I had so I joyfully accepted the position of pupil in his master class until those dreaded words from Kyle came through.. "I can't play" said Kyle.. "you're in" said John....

So, with all the confidence I could muster I bravely took up the mantle and the role of captain for the night (how hard could it be) and arrived early at the courts ready to do battle in the finest tradition of Chamber Exiles and 4th "B" (in name only).

Skillfully positioning myself at 3 after summing up the opposition, I could plainly see that this captaincy thing was actually a doddle as I maneuvered myself on court first. Brimming with confidence and easily winning the knock up I then easily won the toss and I could see he was finished before we had even started. Fearlessly starting the match with a high looping lob serve which my opponent simply could not handle, and with a nonchalant nod and wink to my teammates watching, I raced off and promptly destroyed my opponent 16-14 in the first game.

Realising I had this in the bag and amid huge gales of casual laughter ringing in my ears from my new found friends and teammates I swaggered on court ready to dish out another lesson to my unworthy opponent. Heeding the jocular advice from my supportive teammates to serve a bit more and not to forget that it is actually a running game I quickly found that my opponent had heeded this advice more than me and somehow I lost the next game 15-7.. Now sweating more than I had planned to at this stage with legs a little bit rubbery, I started to feel the first icicles of fear run down my spine as my opponent finished his between game routine of multiple sit ups and push ups..

Driving myself forward now I started to get my game together again and my length and drops improved but so did my opponents effortless speed and movement around the court and I soon found myself 2-1 down losing 15-10. The 4th was pretty much a repeat of the 3rd and although at 13-13 I knew I had him, he hit a lucky cross court dead nick off the wood, and still thoroughly dazed at that unbelievable piece of bad luck, he somehow got the next point and I had lost!!! What happened..!!

Dazed and somewhat overcome by this unexpected loss I deftly reorganised my side and cleverly installed Richard on court next, to knowledgeable winks and nods from my teammates.. Our enthusiasm for this cunning maneuver was somewhat dulled when Richard lost the first game 15-5 but he then stormed back to win the next game 15-12 and with the momentum firmly in his favour he lost the next game 15-9.. So, 2-1 down and with the momentum now unfortunately in his opponents favour Richard stormed into the lead only to be pegged back and pipped at the post 17-15..

Ok, so two matches down but still two to play and a couple of 3-0's would do it for us and boy oh boy did we have the players to do that!! Nah.. we didn't.. Playing the hand I had been dealt with now I sent on the "King" to put a dent in their smug faces and show them how squash should be played.. Strangely the "King" decided to adopt the tactic of giving them a false sense of security by throwing the first game 16-14, the plan being to put his opponent to the sword in the following three games.. having lost the next game 15-1 the plan remained the same to put them to the sword in the next three games, but the "King" had never heard of the saying "don't bring a sword to a gun fight" and was dispatched in the 3rd 15-9 for a 3-0 loss...

With limited options open to me now I threw Fergus on court and reverted to pleading in order to get some form of a result from my team.. this has always served me well in the past but it was clear that Fergus needed a few tears as well as my begging and pleading, and despite prolonging my agony for three close games he ran out 3-0 down losing the 3rd 18-16..

Come back John, I really don't like this captaincy thing...

Overall result: Lost  2- 16

6th A vs Pirates

Our esteemed substitute (the chairman) and I were at Chambers waiting patiently for the Pirates players to arrive – oh shucks the schedule is wrong and we are playing at Pirates, one or two calls and all the players on their way to Pirates. As I stuck my head in the window at Pirates I heard one of their players say it’s now 7 o clock and I am going for a beer and we take the match. Unfortunately not I said as we are all here. They also had a bit of a shambles as Ging gave them late notice and they had no number 4 player.

• On first GG against Les – first two games close 12-15, 12-15 then woke up and Les started getting tired won the next 3  - 3-2 to the good guys
• On second our substitute (silver fox) – welcome to no 1 in the sixth league; 14-16 and 13-15 down in the first two. Some magic was required and the fox through his racquet into the air after losing the second and the racquet came down squarely on his head (this was the magic). Next two games were as tough as ever and the fox had a few match points against him but managed to win 17-15 and 17-15. This took the stuffing out his opponent and the last was 15-8. A great win with plenty of character. 3-2 to the good guys
• Next GBow against Mike. Gavin was playing well and Mike never really pitched on the night – a quick 15-10, 15-6, 15-7  - another 3-2 for the good guys
• On last BigG – was worried about his fitness but with beer in hand he managed a quick 3-0 (for the good guys).

At last a 16 pointer – 16-4

Overall result: Won 16 - 4

6th B vs Wendywood

Um, short report this week. The schedule at the beginning of the season had this match at home. So there we were at Chambers, champing at the bit and ready to go. 6:30 pm and no opponents. 6:45 came and went as did 7pm. Still no-one. Brief check on the website showed a changed schedule… Ooops. Next 30 mins spent trying to get hold of Wendywood with no luck. Too late to get all the way across town now. So we gave up and played an internal tournament followed by the usual at Dops.

Fortunately, when we did finally get hold of Wendywood, they were gracious about the lapse and the match has been rescheduled. Note to self: check Gauteng Squash website weekly to ensure that the fixture holds true.

Overall result: Tba

7th League vs. JCC

It’s so interesting watching Paul play as he susses out his opponent, starts honing in on his weak points and then he begins putting his battle plan into action – I imagine it is very much how he tackles work issues as well. Another meticulous execution by Paul who arranged an early game against Jan-Jan so he could still be at his daughter’s birthday party. (Thank you Emma for letting daddy play, you can be proud that his time away from you was not in vain and it certainly bolstered ours points on the log – “Happy Birthday to you!”). Jan-Jan, so named because he could hit the ball so hard it made an echo, was not skilled enough for our Paul who simply played the basics and the occasional trickle boast which left Jan-Jan with no real reply. I was accused by Chairman John-Gone-Wrong of being too lenient on one of my calls where Jan-Jan was standing in front of the ball. But Paul was not deterred or distracted from his mission and apart from losing a tight first game; Paul sailed home in fine style to win 3-1. A good start!

Lyal started like he didn’t have the correct opponent, he dictated the terms of the game and had his opposite number making all kind of mistakes and frustrating him to no end. Then something happened and I am still not sure what it was (a little like the fact that the 4^th & 6^{th where “B” stands for “Blunder”} league teams ended up at the wrong venue with nobody to play) but suddenly Rob got his groove back and Lyal was under pressure and started rushing and could not come up with a decent length. After being 2-0 up, Lyal stepped off the plane that he was cruising in for an early sabbatical and Rob took the next 3 games without so much as giving Lyal a parachute. I will, however, never berate a team-mate about losing 2-3. At least we had some games to barter with should we need them.

Herkie – dear Herkie!!! Herkie was in sublime form and has just promoted himself to the position of top-diggerdy-dog spot. Apart from a minor lapse in concentration in the second game, he did not give an inch and showed no mercy. Dylan could not match the sheer class of a rampant Herkie Sandenbergh. His drops were out-of-this-world and his placement of the ball was just top class. A performance that made me smile with delight knowing that this guy is in my team! Well done Herkie - ldj! A 3-0 victory meant that I only had to step onto the court for us to win.

The less said about my game the better (but you should know by now that I have a bad case of waffleitis). This was not my proudest moment but I can only say in my defense that karma had its day. I was less than impressed with the marking – the first “bad” call was when I was “supposedly” in the way of a winning length shot and on two other  occasions where Jeremy “turned” at the last minute and instead of asking for a “let” he nailed the ball past me and I was left ducking for cover. Safety first was not the watchword in this instance! In all three instances I was not granted an appeal, so when the marker denied Jeremy a “let” that was sooo obviously a “stroke” in his favour, which would have won him the match – I kept my righteous mouth shut and let matters take their own course. If two wrongs don’t make a right then three certainly does! We had an old man vs. older man battle where there were many – many - many, physical clashes, getting in each other’s way, words with a measure of aggression and disputed points, mostly by Jeremy who was a past master at buying recuperation time. But in the end the gods smiled upon me for some unknown reason and I managed to hang in for a 22-20 decider. Karma and a great lumping dollop of good luck, I believe, had their day.

For the first time in my Crappy Cappie existence I can say the following words:

“We are the log leaders – long may we prevail!”

We all managed to pack our disgruntled demeanors in our kit-bags and retired to Doppio’s for a pleasant nosh!

No: 1 – Lyal vs. Rob (2-3) 15-13 / 15-12 / 6-15 / 7-15 / 5-15

No: 2 – Herkie vs. Dylan (3-0) 15-7 / 15-12 / 15-9

No: 3 – Paul vs. Jan-Jan (3-1) 16-18 / 15-8 / 15-12 / 15-9

No: 4 - Gary vs. Jeremy (3-2) 15-12 / 13-15 / 9-15 / 16-14 / 22-20

“There’s always the same amount of good luck and bad luck in the world. If one person doesn’t get the bad luck, somebody else will have to get it in their place. There’s always the same amount of good and evil, too. We can’t eradicate evil, we can only evict it, force it to move across town. And when evil moves, some good always goes with it. But we can never alter the ratio of good to evil. All we can do is keep things stirred up so neither good nor evil solidifies. That’s when things get scary. Life is like a stew, you have to stir it frequently, or all the scum rises to the top.” – Tom Robbins, Still Life with Woodpecker

“Ear-Ear”

   Gary

Overall result: Won 14 - 6

8th League vs. Wendywood

Another win and double digit score, albeit the lowest of the season to date!

We played the Wendywood second side that could easily beat the Wendywood first side. Mike @ #4 on first after the opponents arrived late, Indian time. The oke made too many mistakes (obviously pressure from Mike) and a relatively easy win saving 4 game points in the process. 3-0 up.

Peter LR @ #3 had a good battle. He played a little loose at times and saved a couple of match points for a much needed, good win 3-2. Quote “my hardest match of the season.”

Stratford @ #2 started on an adjacent court and lost the first, levelled the second against a sunshade, bespectacled oriental. Francis’ training paying dividends but alas it was not to last. Stratford could not get a rhythm going and lost the next 2 to loose 3-1.

Not a good sign as Nick @ #1 needed 2 games to secure the match as we were on the wrong end of a points count out.

He won the first, lost the second, oops. A swift team talk followed that consisted of “you have to win the next game” and “always stay in front points wise”!  Nick listened and acted, saving a couple of game points to win the third and secure the match, and thus maintain the team’s unbeaten record. Unfortunately the next two were not in Nick’s favour and he lost 3-2, yet again!

The opposition did provide us with bevies, limited choice, but did not join us for a meal, so Peter LR, Nick and Mike went to The Baron and scoffed a mighty, meat curry pie. Our stand in Captain, Peter LR, will be having a word with the Captain Peter F about the absence of certain team members at meal time. This is the second time for such an occurrence and hopefully a hat trick will not be forthcoming. Nothing that a subtle whisper in the ear could address.

Squash Tip of the Week

Squash is 80% down the wall and 20% other shots.

Overall result: Won 11 - 8

9th League vs. Dainfern

Die winter koue le nou diep in die been. En n lys van 7 reserwes  help nie veel as die binne kring span sick lame en lazy is nie. Maar die motivator doen sy ding en dis nie lank nie en vier wakker Spartans is honger vir daardie physio’s wat belowe is. Nou ewe skielik is Chuck Norris se naam eerste op die lys, die Porra laat nie op hom wag nie en die pony tail Boertjie vra net directions na Dainfern. Waar sit hulle breins – aag ons weet mos.

Translated it says - The good old captain had no problem getting his team together for the game against Dainfern.

First game, number 4.

Chris is up against the self nominated BEE candidate for the opposition. After 15 minutes of strapping up his injured ankle and looking like his team mate Vince, (full of straps that is) he was ready for the game. Slooowly and moving carefully on the court Chris had Courtney guessing. It worked and zip zap and three love to Chambers.

Number 3.

Andy had a busy training schedule in the last two weeks – playing his brother Peter le Roux once, but proudly announced that he was the victorious one.  So the dreaded thing happened to the unfit Andy, after four hard working games the score was 2 each. Still thinking of the promised physio’s, Andy knew where his loyalty lies and he dearly wanted a win in the final. But he did not do justice to himself and the mind and will was there but the legs still back in UK.

Chambers down 3-2

Number 2.

Leslie was quite chuffed at playing number two, totally convinced that he’s not up to it. And a battle it was, hanging in there but after the first two games Leslie was 2 games down. Maar daai Porra kan himself motiveer jong. Seker ook die beloftes van die Physio’s.  Luscious I tell you, according to the pic’s, juicy like a Portuguese chicken thighs. Back to the game, now Leslie is a PT himself and poor Thomas hit a brick wall, he tried drops and boasts to get the ball away from his opponent. But Leslie was everywhere, from the right hand front tin to the left back corner retrieving lobs. And soon it was 2 games each. Both players was by this time knackered, even on this cold winters night, sweat was everywhere.  Thomas did everything out of the book, really good calculated shots, but to no avail. The Porra won.

Chamber up 3-2

Number 1

The opponent team lost interest by this time, the Heinekens’ had better attraction.  But the Spartans stood by their man and cheered him on. Kobus had to work for it and Jehiel was hitting hard, especially the serves. Kobus had a strategic serve return shot (which never worked) but tried it in any way. The games went ping pong until the fifth. As usual the pony tailed Boertjie corrected the empire from the court just to air his views. Kobus played well and the back hand wall shots was excellent.  A tired Kobus walked victorious off the court (again promised to stop smoking)

Chambers 3-2 up.

A great 3-1 victory for the 9^th titanic Spartans

Well done team !!

Overall result: Won  14 - 7

10th OMT (Old Mans Team) vs St Stithians

Not too difficult finding the main entrance to the school. However extreme difficulty finding the squash courts in their vast school grounds. However, we all eventually located them.

Brain #1 Getting back his rhythm and his winning ways and off to a good start for the team, winning 3-0.

Paddy #2  Failed to take his chances, but lost his way in the important fifth, losing 2-3.

Keith #3 Unlike Brian, was unable to get into the game and lost 0-3.

John #4 Tried hard but unfortunately too many mistakes. Lost 0-3

Final result 5-12

A few observations:

Aggregate age of Chamber team +- 240 odd giving an average of +-60

Aggregate age of opponents  +-60 giving an average of +-15

Unlike our opponents, our parents were not able to support and cheer us on. Fortunately Des was there in support.

Nice gesture when your arrive and your opponent greets you  ‘Sir’.

Compliment to the school: Youngsters were extremely well mannered and behaved, a credit to the school.

Overall result: Lost 5 - 12

10th YMT (Young Mans Team) vs Wits

As the new kid on the block and Warwick not available to play we were forced to bring in the van antwerpen family!

Juan - philip won 3-2

Richard lost 3-0

Matium lost 3-1

Juan- louis lost 3-1

Overall result: Lost 5 - 14

Ladies 3rd LEAGUE vs Randburg

Jenny won 3-1

Belinda won 3-1

Charlene won 3-1

Chrisna won 3-2

Overall result: Won 16 - 4

4th B (DEFINITELY NOW IN NAME ONLY) vs Southern Suburbs

4B set off on a high to the far south after beating the A team last match.

Ron got there nice and early as his new beau only lives round the corner, he left the court nice and early as well having been demolished by his opponent.

Nick on next, in a good run of form and picking up some valuable tips from the “wrincklies” in the team and played nicely to win 3-1.

Next was Rich against Richard. This was a match of note with Rich leading 2-1 and looking comfortable, but the Suburbs Richard is renowned for never giving up and he won the 4^th and narrowly took the 5^th 15-13

That left the Silver Fox to play Paul the Plumber to decide the night. Having embarrassed him a few years ago, P the P was psyched up to win and never let the Fox in with a chance. Down 0-3.

Having refused all beers after the match Ron then decided to drown his sorrows by falling into a drain walking back to the car. Nick was left astounded when one minute he was talking to Ron and the next he’d disappeared. Should he laugh or cry. Luckily Ron had done no serious damage, except to his pride, and the ditch was dry anyway - a bad night all round.

Ginos food though was as good as ever.

Overall result: Lost  5- 13

6th A vs 6B

The big match had arrived experience against youth – we knew this was going to be tough when Mark insisted on playing George (still struggling to wonder why and I suppose Mark is wondering why post the match) and we had George to play Louis. To make it fair we each put down names and positions and then played in that order (they guessed our positions better than we guessed theirs)

•     BigG against Mark – BigG warmed up properly by giving the first to Mark. Then showed Mark how to move around the court and took the next 2 games. George on top in the 4th and a huge stroke call against George for standing in the middle of the court and driving the ball down the wall which Mark could not reach. This turned events and Mark one the game. At this stage Mark assumed he was home and dry while BigG put on the pressure to take the game. 3-2 to the good guys.

•     At the same time young Louis (ex team member) against GavinG. Managed to take the first (but it was tight), it was the second that wore me out somewhat 20-18. I now needed to get my breath back but Louis was having none of that and he piled on the pressure running at everything and taking the next two games. Played Louis enough times to know that he had to be slowed down and then he started the errors (thank goodness) and I managed the game. 3-2 to the good guys.

•     Jacques on against Bruce – Jacques cruised in the 1st game and it seemed as if it was all over. Jacques then decided that since he has not played for such a long time he was going to get his money worth and gave the next two games to Bruce. Not sure what happened afterwards as I am sure we took another game before Bruce took the final which would have made the score 3-2 but 3-1 is what our opponents insist on. 3-1 to the bad guys

•     GavinB on last against Nigel. Again GavinB took the first and we thought great 3 matches to one, Nigel was thinking otherwise. Gavin had heard that Nigel had chosen him as his opponent as this was a guaranteed win, he did not want to disappoint Nigel so gave him the next two games. The same happened in this rubber I am sure that GavinB got another game but our young opponents insisted that it was 3-1 and not 3-2. 3-1 to the bad guys

Well that was it for the evening 2 matchs each but the games going to the youngsters (sure there should be a COTY nomination for missing the 2 games which would have given the A team an additional 2 points) – Revenge will be sweet just as it was last year.

Overall result: Lost 8 - 12

6th B vs 6th A

It will be interesting to see what is written in the match report for our less-esteemed 6^th A team, but the fact remains that the bragging rights belong to us after our derby night showdown. Any disparaging remarks would certainly stem only from a bitter jealously and resentment on their part as they strive to reach the heights of the 6^th B (in name only) team. Given that we were playing on 2 courts, I only observed two games – one of those being in the capacity of player. So, for the others I have used the game scores and poetic license to write the match report. Probably no more a work of fiction than usual, then?

Breaking the ice were Mark and George: First game was a bit of a warm up with quite a few mistakes, but it went to Mark so we were off on the right foot. Expecting George to be wheezing at this stage, Mark relaxed. Big mistake as Big George put his mark (bad pun) on the next game and swept to a 15-5 win. Bit of a wake-up for Mark, but he knew that George would be puffing now. Not to be – George hit some great length and had the drops pinpointed to cut off anything loose and took the third. Herculean effort from Mark now as he threw everything into the fourth game. It was looking grim at 14-11 down, but Mark pulls a wonder drop from the back of the court to regain serve and eventually win the game. So 2-a-piece: surely George would be on the point of a coronary now? Nope – it appears that the Saturday cycling and gym sessions are paying dividends as George eased out to take the match. Lost 2-3.

Simultaneously on the court next door were Gavin G and Louis with our complimentary marker for the evening - Dave. The first two games were tight as could be with Gavin taking both 15-13 and 20-18. So down by two and 6^th B looking down the barrel. Louis had to shift gears and shift them he did. Next two games coming in with relative comfort to even things up again at 2-a-piece. Age/experience played it’s hand here as Gavin, who had been a bit shell shocked with the turnaround, tightened things up and forced some errors from Louis taking the last game fairly comfortably and bring the 6^th A’s their second match. Lost 2-3.

Again on parallel courts, it was Bruce against Jacques and Nigel against Gavin B. It was crunch time for 6^th  B’s as we needed wins in both to stand a chance. First games on both courts went to the 6^th A’s though. Uh oh, bragging rights were looking shifting in favour of the 6^th A’s. We couldn’t have that happen. Second game with Nigel vs Gavin: Nigel gets well into the lead with a fair cushion of points. Then Gavin turns up the heat a bit and evens it up. Last push from Nigel sees him take the game 15-13. By all accounts, the same happened with Bruce and Jacques with the same scoreline. So, 1 all on both courts. Third game, Nigel races away with it and gets an easy-ish 15-7 game. Bruce does the same to Jacques with a 15-5 game. So, 2-1 on both courts. I see Bruce at the break and leave him with those infinitely helpful words of wisdom: “Let’s finish this”. Proved a bit more difficult in practise though – Gavin was making it a bit difficult by hitting a difficult length but extra legs carried me through in the end. As was the case with Bruce. 2 x wins at 3-1.

All done by 8:15 and it was off to the Dop amidst threats of a reverse of the results on the return match.

Overall result: Won 12 - 8

8th League vs. Edenvale

We hosted Edenvale last night and another emphatic win for our team, winning 3 games and bagging 14 points. This is what happened:

First on was Peter le Roux given a generous draw at No 3. Starting slowly and paid the price by losing the first game. Although it must be said that his opponent played a few good boasts to sneak in and win it. But from game two onwards it was fairly plane sailing for Peter as he cruised to a 3-1 win.

Next on at No 4 was George Bowen, for the Laurel and Hardy show. He blitzed through the first two games without working up a sweat. Fell asleep (bored) in the 3^rd but came back strongly in the 4^th. No contest, another easy 3-1 win for George, unbeaten this season as he pursues the MVP title.

Stratford on next, playing at No 2. The first two games were closely contested with each winning a game. Stratford got his nose ahead in the 3^rd and hung on to take the 4^th for another 3-1 win for the team. Also unbeaten this season….

Finally at No 1, Captain Pete Fillmore, up against a tough Sri Lankan opponent who frustrated him in the first two games. The bounce of the ball and luck was clearly against Pete. But he hung in there and managed to pressurise his opponent with some tight squash in the 3^rd and 4^th to claw back to 2-2. Unfortunately the fifth started badly and Pete fell behind never to regain the ascendency, losing 2-3 in a ding-dong battle.

We retreated to Doppio’s for a pizza and a beer with our opponents, who were very gracious in defeat.

Overall result: Won 14 - 6

9th League vs. Edenvale

Good day, Titans!!!!!!!

After a losing streak that we and our kind would like to rather forget, the mighty and once again battle-ready Titans made their way, on what was a chilly autumn night, to the far reaches of the earth to reclaim honour and pride at all cost. After ducking and diving for two weeks, the Edenvale enemy had finally overcome their fear and scraped together a small cosmopolitan force of reluctant racket wielding mercenaries of different tongue and tribe. 

(That fear was, of course, induced by the Titans' over-eager early arrival on their shores on the night when we were actually meant to take on Bryanston in a home game. And we had thought that our true captain and Master, Chris the Cantankerous, had no hidden agenda nor strategy…)

The night's foreplay (read 'voor-wedstryd') came in the form a few ladies league games during which Leslie the Lecherous drooled so badly on his chest that it looked like he'd already played a match by the time the only holy Titan, Gabriel the Wingless, stepped onto the court to challenge the Far East's No. 2. Soon, however, the on court humidity exceeded the mist around Leslie as Gabriel and his opponent locked horns, so to speak. Gabriel lost the first but found his breath in the second and, with his patented measuring look of quiet superiority and adequate pauses to allow his opponent to catch his breath, he battled on to a razor-edge two games all standoff. A slightly longer break between games transpired eventually and all present knew that BMT developed over countless eons would be all that could save our replacement cherub. The score of the final game escapes me now but suffice to say that Gabriel the (now) Great turned his back to the long vertical crack in the corner between the front and right side walls – testimony to the other-worldly forces at work – and looked up at the gallery as if to say, "What the #@&$ did you guys expect?"

Next up was Willie against a wily captain with an injured ankle. I did not get to see the game but Willie's tenacious hip injury was worse than his opponent's swollen ankle and he went down graciously in 3 games. Fair game might have been if we'd fielded our own injured ankle in the form of Captain Chris, but Willie has never shied away from pain.

At the same time I worked my way to an easier than anticipated 3-0 win on the court on the other side of the wall. Perhaps the whole Guptagate saga had had an effect on the No 1 Indian from the East or maybe his mind was still at the wedding… Either way, he seemed unfocused and distant and maintained the same relationship with the ball.

With the Titans in the lead by 2 matches to one, Leslie the Lecherous then stepped onto court. Being the dodgy bugger we've come to know so well, he pretended to limp during warm-up, fouled easy shots and worked hard to convince his opponent that victory would come easy. Unbeknownst to the slightly less hairy easterner Leslie had been working on that survival act since childhood in Lisbon, albeit to attract the sympathy of the fairer sex. To add to the guise he wore his super trendy leg warmers (hockey socks) and sleeveless shirt, emphasizing his upper body strength and detracting attention from his lower body agility and speed. Three short games passed, interrupted only to borrow Willie's less used and more gripping squash tackies and, almost without breaking a sweat (almost), Leslie helped to secure a convincing comeback for the once again feared Titans!

Scores;

Chambers  – 3

Edenvale   - 1

Overall result: Won  12 - 4

10th OMT (Old Mans Team) vs Old Eds

Ø  First on was Brian at #1 against the jovial Israeli Yoav. No problem, Brian worked hard, played well and only conceded 10, 3 & 10 points. Good start 3/0 up  

Ø  Next on was Keith at #2 against the lanky Justin who brought his vivacious GF Ash along. Keith did well to get 10 points in the 1^st & 12 in the 2^nd. Then the wheels came off and Keith could only manage 4 points in the 3^rd. 0/3

Ø  Enter Paddy at #3 against Steve. Although being well rested and sharp after an extended holiday, Paddy also had to work hard and had to draw heavily on his considerable experience and use his full array of clever shots. All the games were nail bitingly close, but Paddy determinedly kept it together conceding 12, 13 & 11 points. 3/0

Ø  Finally, John was on at #4 against Patrick. Lost the 1^st game getting 10 points but was seriously distracted in the 2^nd (see GF above) getting only 4 points. Fortunately join then regained his rhythm (?), and got up to 11 points in the 3rd . 0/3

So, it was six games to each side and time to count points. Well, with Keith and John only managing 4 points each in one of the games they lost @#$%*&^%#$%&^% the points score was a rather close 141 – 149. Only eight points in the end, but we lost the match.

Des and JohAn were there in support as usual (on a chilly night at cold Old Eds courts brrrrr), but BAb underwent his cataract surgery the day before so was excused. That’s apart from the shoulder surgery from which BAb is still recovering. The sick, lame & lazy squad members will be back soon to win some matches for the team – watch this space.  

Off to JB’s Corner at Melrose Arch for dinner, where we were not only joined by GF Ash, but also the Old Eds 8^th league team who had a bye or something on the night but in typical Chamber 10 (A) spirit played each other, supported their 10^th league team and ogled Ash the GF.

Overall result: Lost 6 - 8

10th YMT (Young Mans Team) vs Edenvale

A Home game for us against Edenvale.

Warwick went in as number 2 and won 3-1

Richard played number 3 and his fitness ensured he won 3-2

Matium played number 4 and won 3-0

Juan-Philip our dedicated sub played number 1 and again fitness prevailed to win the game 3-1

Overall result: Won 16 - 4