The Chamber Exiles Squash Club: 6 May 2012

1st LEAGUE vs Parkview 02

We won again

Kelvin won 3 - 0
Mwansa won 3 - 1
Francisco lost 2 - 3
Stan lost 2 – 3

And we’re 2^nd in the league.

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Overall result: Won 12 - 7

2nd LEAGUE vs Dainfern

Gary 1 played Andrew Tricher was 2-0 up but ended up losing 2-3.

Willem 2 played Peter Dickenson, lost 0-3.

Dane 3 played Mark fought back well to get to 2 all, but lost the 5^th.

Rob 4 played Sharon, some close moments, but won 3-0.

Overall result: Lost 7 - 12

Ryan made a number of mistakes, in the tin of all places. Had the match stolen from him by a wrinkly!!!
Vevek, Dave and Andrew were not stretched, though the opposition can sure run
Dave did tweak his hammy running for a drop which turned out to be a hard cross court
This changing direction is getting tougher and tougher.
We should just not do it!
Team stayed and watched the no. 1's in 1st league against Parkview, 1 of their 3 sides in that league
Kelvin Ndhlovu (ranked 3 nationally) played and beat Zuko Kubukeli (ranked 11) 3/0
It was one of the best matches I've seen in the last 10 years
These guys can move and I now can see why the green dot has been introduced

Cheers
Dave

Overall result: Won 14-3

5th League vs Old Eds

Away at “testosterone city” – why so many people see fun in gymming beats me!!

As the rest of the team were late (as usual), the Silver Fox went on first against a youngish fittish Gavin with one of those horrible, dead, green-dot balls. Gavin did a lot of running after boasts, drops and lobs and went 2-1 up. However SF increased the pressure dramatically with the last 2 being won 15-2, 15-10. Although my team-mates appeared tense, I was always in control.

Rich on next against Jason (a loud George Bowen-like character). Won the first 2 closely 20-18, 15-13 with some of his classic volley drops causing much damage. Had a wobble in the 3^rd but came through comfortable in the 4^th for a 3-1 win.

G-bow’s first start of the season was a tricky one but the oppos lack of fitness helped G-bow to a 3-1 win.

So no pressure on Ron, again playing at No 1 seeing as he was last to arrive and bragging how he’d run with Frankie for an hour at the weekend. His Israeli opponent however was too young, fit and fast and even a last-gasp, desperate altercation with the marker in the 3^rd couldn’t prevent a 3-0 defeat –it’s tough at No 1 Ron even if the marker is blind as a bat (in your opinion!!!).

So a good 12-7 victory was followed by a tasty steak, egg and chips in the Old Eds pub

Overall result: Won 12 - 7

6th League A vs Old Eds

On first at no 4 Louis against John – Louise just too strong and raced to 15-4 in the first game, John came back a bit but Louis took the next 2 games 15-10 15-10 (good start 3-0)

On second Gerhard at no 2 against Ian – went down 8-15 in the first but Gerhard is a slow starter (I thought), after the second game we were in serious trouble losing 6-15, Gerhard tried in the last but to no avail losing 11-15. Ian was good but Gerhard made him look great. Now level one match each.

On 3^rd Gavin at no 3 against Rael – see-sawed until I took the first game 15-11, second game passed in a flash 15-3, Rael tried in the last (also by trying to influence the marker for a few strokes J) but I took it 15-12. Two matches to one, could our loan player give us the game we needed?

Fergus (….thanks to John and his team for the 1 game we needed we could not have done it without you) – Fergus played Volker and never looked to be in real trouble although Volker did not give it to him on a plate. Fergus winning 16-14, 15-12, 15-12. With the first game being so close I wondered if I was going to be thanking John J.

Overall result: Won 12 - 3

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6th League B vs UJ

After the easy pickings last week against the 6^th A’s, we knew that this week would be a toughie. In our favour, we were playing UJ and it was the middle of the first test week – so the students would be eager to quit procrastinating by playing squash and drinking beer and get back to the books.

No. 1 Phil vs Jared: This guy had some serious speed to go with a very tight game. That Phil managed to get one game off him is a credit. I didn’t see much of the game, but what I did see was pretty impressive – nicely played by Phil, but up against a ringer and couldn’t get the ball past him enough. Lost 1-3; 14-16,15-5, 7-15, 10-15.

No. 2 Bruce vs Murray: If the UJ no. 1 was a ringer, then the no. 2 was even more so. Murray arrived late after playing a hockey match beforehand and still had plenty of legs left. Virtually zero unforced errors in the first two games and fetching the ball from all parts left Bruce very little to play with and they were over quickly. But our Bruce is made of sterner stuff and started to find his rhythm in the third game. At 12 all there was a marathon rally of note which would have left lesser men with a coronary. Not Three Oceans Bruce though and he pulled the point out of the bag only to lose the next by way of crappy serve. Now 13 all, there was another zillion shot rally with Bruce again claiming the point. Any euphoria was quickly lost though as he tinned the next shot and then lost two more to lose the match. Great all round squash though. Lost 0-3; 8-15, 6-15, 14-16.

No. 3 Nigel vs Ruan: My oppo was someone who looked the part – right up until the first service. And then he just faded into background noise. The only points he got coming from my unforced errors. Easy points, but I’ll take what I can get. Won 3-0; 15-4, 15-6, 15-7.

No. 4 Brennan vs Eric: Brennan’s opposite number seemed a little too eager to assure us that he was a fill in from 9^th league – didn’t believe a word of it. And the on court performance proved this. He gave a loose hitting Brennan a hard time in the first three games with all being close battles, but Brennan ending up on the winning side of two of them. Think Eric pushed himself a bit too far in the third because Brennan just creamed in the fourth and took the match. Another victory for the Bionic Wrist. Won 3-1; 15-12, 16-14, 13-15, 15-7.

Doppios called us again for a calorie laden end to the evening – now a 3 week break to get into shape before the next league game…

Overall result: Won 9 - 7

7th A League vs. Wendywood

Try as I might I can’t seem to make this report any less depressing!

I work in Linbro Park, 5 minutes away from the Wendywood club, so I was the obvious choice to “Garmin” George there. I left for the club, while George was still on the phone to me and negotiating the Marlboro/Bowling T- junction.

When I arrived at Wendywood George was 2 games down! George did rally somewhat (punny) to take the third game, but was outgunned and outrun in the fourth by his hard-hitting/running opponent.

An inauspicious (though speedy) start. On the positive side, Dr Paul did say that marking this match was way preferable to recent matches involving Mike H.

Next on Dr Paul vs Maricus. Steady, solid, almost flawless play from Maricus was just too much for Paul to handle.

We needed a win. Could Karel deliver against Joe? Apparently not. Joe was cast in the same mould as George’s opponent. Hard-hitting, mobile, relentless.

Finally the two more elderly and sedate gents took the court, Steph vs Alec. Though Alec professed to not do running, he moved pretty well.

Results similar to George’s (though not as quick). So all in all a very poor result for Chamber, despite our best efforts, against a strong Wendywood.

I reckon they could play in any order. 7B take heed!

We were slightly cheered up by some good steaks at the Baron afterwards.

Results:

Chamber Wendywood

Paul F 0 – 3 Maricus

Karel G 0 - 3 Joe

George B 1 – 3 ?

Steph S 1 – 3 Alec

Overall result: Lost 2 - 16

7th B League vs. Modderfontein

Not a good night of squash with only Vince the bright light.

We lost 3-12

1 Nic lost 0-3

2 Peter F lost 0-3

3 Peter LR lost 0-3

4 Vince won 3-0.

Overall result: Lost 3 - 12

9th LEAGUE vs Wanderers (or in Boerjtie taal – Wonderers)

Thirsty for a win the able Captain sourced a ringer from his long list of reserves. An Englishman to play for the Three Boertjies and an Englhishman team but “die koei is in die sloot” so we had to do what a team must do.

First game was Gabriel, our silver bullet. A big worry as he had a warm up game before and seemed very tired. But he climbed in and in a short time he was up two games. Niel, the opponent fought back and took the third. The game was on and red faced players was puffing and panting, but the canny strategic move from the able Captain worked well, and Gabriel took the fourth. A win for Chambers.

Chambers - 3 Wonderers - 1

Then our no 3, Anthony, the Englishman took to court. I need to record this. Anthony played well, really well. He hit hard, ran a lot, even slipped once or twice. His hard work was rewarded with a win in the third, but as they say in the classics there is no comments column on the score board and Anthony went down 1 – 3

Chambers - 1 Wonderers - 3

Third on at no 2 position was Chris. The first warm up game went to Wanderers and after one up one down and two games each the final game was played. Tight shots from the Wonderers Captain and his superior fitness was the deciding factor and Chris went down in the fifth.

Chamber – 2 Wonderers - 3

Chambers was back against the wall. Now up to Henri, the no 1 Boertjie walked on court, confident that tonight was the night. But alas and in short, he bit the dust and Chambers representative team in the 9 league went down (again).

Chambers - 0 Wonderers - 3

Final score = Wonderers 3– Chambers 1

And words of wisdom from Mumbai

Hi All from a hot and bustling Mumbai where the honking of horns never cease and pollution is the only thing more prevalent than the production of Bollywood movies!

Thanks for the match report, 'boss' (my Indian vocab is growing by the

minute) and Team for everyone's efforts towards a track record consistency. We may not be outwardly the best but we'll die trying and never EVER give up.

Even when we're bleeding in trenches dug in wood sprung floor with ruined rackets we ought to dig deep and find the moral corruption to voice veiled threats at our triumphant opponents, warning them with certainty that there SHALL be another day, all the while the echoes of the last shots played reminding us that the eternal wheel of justice turns and that retribution cannot be denied for those who simply will not quit.

The English have a funny way of coining philosophical sayings like this one for lionhearts like us and experience has taught that in all situations, he who laughs last does indeed laugh... well, last.

Let us rise up, lift our chins high, shoulders squared and look the victors in the eye and with deep and eternal conviction and unwavering voice declare that WE SHALL NOT BE DOMINATED FOREVER!

OK, OK, so sleep depravation and spicy food is getting the better of me. :-)

Keep well, gentlemen!

Overall result: Lost 6 - 13