Got this from Gauteng Squash via email

Please note, that as per rule 15.2, the high altitude ball (green dot) will be used as of the 1st September 2012 (see rule below). All men's leagues and ladies 1st and 2nd leagues are required to use the high altitude/green dot ball. It is the responsibility of the home team (rule 15.1) to provide a new ball for the match. The high altitude/green dot ball can be obtained from Parkview or Old Edwardians and is also stocked in smaller supply at a few other clubs.

15. BALLS

15.1 All matches shall start with a new ball provided by the home team.

15.2 The Dunlop green dot ball must be used in all Men's leagues as well as Ladies 1st and 2nd league matches from 1st September 2011 to 30th April 2012 and again from 1st September 2012 for the remainder of league. Ladies 3rd and 4th league shall use a double yellow dot ball, but may make use of the green dot ball if both players agree to do so.

Regards,

Central Gauteng Squash

1st LEAGUE vs Old Eds

Kelvin won 3-0

Frankie lost 0  - 3
Gareth won 3-1
Mwansa won 3-0

Overall result: Won 12 - 4

2nd LEAGUE vs Old Eds

Gary didn’t play so no match report

Stan: 3-0

Willem: 1-3

Robbie: 0-3

Ryan 1-3

Overall result: Lost 5 - 12

4th League vs Bryanston

Henri,Fourie- vs. Dave,Peacock- with the team 2-0 up, Dave went on hoping to close out the match while I had a quick shower. Got back to the court as the 1^st ended to find Dave hobbling with a damaged foot that happened seemingly without any obvious cause. Despite being advised to retire, Dave soldiered on ( read hobbled on), and managed to win a game, making it easier for Flip who still had to play. Hope it’s not serious Dave, get better soon, your Province needs you for the inter Provincial soon
15-10 15-2 14-16 15-4

Chris,van Heeswijk- vs. Che,Lue- ding-dong match with the “General” settling into the “one for me, one for you, one for me, one for you...” with just a little nervous moment in the 5^th when after being 13-9 up, Che got back to 13 all and I fortunately managed to finish.
15-11 13-15 15-7 8-15 15-13

Andrew,McKeaveney- vs. Peter,Gillies- Andrew once again up against a well experienced opponent, managed to keep Peter out of the match with good hard hitting squash. Andrew was surprised to hear later that Peter is uver 65, and has a son who is old enough to be Andrews dad.
15-9 15-6 15-11

Phillip,Van Antwerpen- vs. Dino  Up last (but definitely not least) Flip came up against Dino, and ex Bryanston player filling in for their injured captain Allan Againz. First two were comfortable with  Flip’s drops working well. Rest game in the third had the team a little worried, but Flip managed to close out the fourth to win 3-, for a team win.

15-11 15-11 6-15 15-8

Retired to Doppio for the customary pizza’s

Overall result: Won  12 – 6

5th League vs Dainfern

Dainfern were sniffing at our heels in the league so an important match to win.

The Silver Fox starting the night off as usual…………….and UNusually didn’t go to 5, winning 3-0 without raising a sweat (not much of an opponent I’m afraid)

G-Bow on next, just wasn’t the G-Bow we know and love………………in fact he was pretty useless I’m afraid, doing well to win 1 game. We all have off-nights Gav.

Grrrrrrrrich then played young Devon who had thumped him 3-0 in the first half of the season. This was not to be a repeat performance with Rich chasing everything down and frustrating the living sh*t out of the youngster and taking the first 2 games. The youngster was taking out his frustration on the ref and the door and the odd spectator (but hey George B is pretty thick-skinned). The next 2 were just about identical with Rich getting to 13-9 up in both and managing to throw them away. The 5^th looked to be similar but this time Rich held his nerve for a brilliant 3-2 win.

That took a little bit of the pressure off “The King” playing No 1 and needing 2 games to win the match against Tony who he’d narrowly beaten in the 1^st half. Losing the first badly to 7, The King took control and won the next 2 with some great varied squash. Resting in the 4^th, The King sailed through the 5^th for a Royal win of note.

Overall result: Won 13 – 7

6th League A vs Wits

Gerhard,Botha- vs. Laura,Buck-
11-15 15-13 16-14 15-13

H,Yilmaz- vs. Gavin,Geldenhuys-
13-15 15-8 15-11 10-15 15-12

Dhiren,Parbhoo- vs. Jacques,van Jaarsveld-
10-15 9-15 15-11 15-12 15-6

ROLAND,SKINNER- vs. Louis,Kruger-
15-5 15-12 5-15 15-13

Overall result: Lost  13 - 8

6th League B vs Wits

During the second half of the league, our squash has taken an exponential turn in terms of results. Unfortunately it’s an inverse exponential trend and we’ve hit rock bottom and started digging. If I have to write many more of these reports, I’m going to have to go on lithium.

Phil was recovering from some infection that he picked up at OppiKoppi. Apparently it wasn’t that kind of infection. He seemed to cruise through the first game on auto-pilot winning points at will against Anthony. And then… Anthony, being the fogey that he is, tightened his game and got his length right with the rest of the match being hard fought, but Phil never getting far enough ahead to close things out. Lost 1-3.

Bruce up next against Janice, the Parkview pin-up player of the year that had set our 6^th league colleagues thoughts spinning to the extent that they included a photo of her in the match report. Not to disappoint, I have done the same to illustrate what all the fuss is about. She is a model after all. Bruce has proudly admitted to being whipped (so to speak) by the lass, but did mention that he thought the extremely short skirt she was sporting gave her a massive and unfair advantage. Lost 0-3.

Then Lyal against Bongi – a game which started with Lyal storming to a 2 zip lead with thoughts already on the icy lagers waiting after the game. Then Parkview went into a huddle, strategizing on a game plan. They take their squash seriously, these Parkviewtonians. Some Most might say too seriously. Whatever the case, the strategy paid dividends and Bongi came back to sneak victory after some entertaining rallies. Lost 2-3.

Last on, I was up against that pillar of moral value, that bastion of fair play – Graeme. I had narrowly beaten him in the first round although the majority of the game was spent in heated debate with the marker. This time around it was also a tight game, but too many squandered points saw me unable to take advantage of his lack of fitness. Another loss 1-3.

The outcome of this was a third dismal 16 pointer. The relegation zone is calling us – hopefully to be avoided with a late season surge…

Overall result: Lost 4 - 16

7th A League vs. Pirates

Close but not good enough.

Paul: down 0-3. I tried and played some good squash with a few exceptional rallies in the third, but Rob was just too good – he made it look easy.

Karel: won 3-1.  A wobbly start losing the first, but came back in excellent form, and his opponent started to make mistakes.  Possibly Karel’s best game of the year.

Steph: down 0-3.  Steph played really well, but the opponent was just too good (believe he plays 3^rd league masters).

George: won 3-0. Played some great squash against a good opponent.

We played well against a good team and did better than I thought we were likely to do.  If only one (or two) more games had been in our favour.

P.S.

Could just add that we went down despite enthusiastic vocal support from injured Mike H.

No-one had an appetite to prolong the agony, so no Doppios.

Overall result: Lost 10 - 7

7th B League vs. Jeppe

Niel,Van Jaarsveld- vs. Nic,Papatheodorou-
15-6 15-13 13-15 15-7

Vaughan,Cameron-Gunn- vs. Peter,Fillmore-
15-7 15-7 15-9

Linky,Van Jaarsveld- vs. Digby,Chapman-
15-7 16-18 11-15 15-4 15-4

ANTON,ENGELBRECHT- vs. David,Hamilton-
15-8 16-14 15-11

Overall result: Lost 3 - 16

9th LEAGUE vs Wits (2 weeks ago)

After a spade of losses, the team was hungry for a win. Bad luck struck with our one and only Englishman gentleman, opting for a job in Cape Town, Absolute no regards for the Boertjies he learned to love back in the Old Transvaal.   But off he went and the team scratched hard and deep and found a replacement in a korfbal player of Portuguese descend.  Affectionately known as THE PORRA.

So with a permanant replacement and a stand in here is the game results.

Player 1 at position 1.

Chambers – Chris   = 3  vs   Wits–  Tina  = 1

Chris was in his element feeling 30 years younger playing the young student. The game plan was to play the ball low and see what happens. First game in the bag, and playing good squash was now a option. She retaliated in good style and with hard hitting shots and  lightning movements did justice to her number one position and won the second game. Chris had his Captain and number one position to uphold and climbed in, hitting hard, down the wall and even some in the nick. Tina was no match and the game ended in a convincing 3-1 to Chambers

Player 2 at position 2

Chambers –  Kobus  = 3  vs   Wits-   Chris   = 0

Now, Kobus loves his squash and he plays with zest. Blitsige (lighting) moves, 360 degree twirls and constant moves is his  game play. Chris tried hard and tried to match the energetic moves but he was no match. Kobus out run and outplayed his opponent and a nice 3 - love to Chambers

Player 3 at position 3

Chambers --  Lesley  = 3  vs   Wits --  Shaun  = 2

Leslie (the Porra) had to play himself into the prestigious 9^th league team. As Captain I gave him the list of requirements he had to adhere to, to make the grade. He flunked the first requirement by not speaking the Taal and nearly got the boot. But when it got to playing squash, he made up with enthusiasm. The first two games made him feel good. He played well, nice and tight and moving well. Then Shaun came out with down the wall shots and some nice boasts. The Porra was rattled, but digging deep into his natural athletic abilities he fought back. The last game was 14 all, what do I do now, he says to himself ?? A, ha, a place in the team (remember – prestigious) was at stake, I have to do it or play korfbal all my life. A good inner decision was made and  like a good hot Portuguese prego roll on a Friday afternoon he rose to the occasion.  Klapped the opponent I say, and the result was 3 - 2 to Chambers.

Player 4 at position 4

Chambers -- Willie  = 0   vs   Wits  -- Substitute = 3

Willie hasn’t played for years and unfortunately that took its toll. The basics and ball sense was there, but when the ball came off fast from the serve, Willie tried to Badminton it, that did nooooot work. So with a training schedule from the Captain, Willie was sent home to train and to come back to fulfil his position back in the team.

End result   - Chambers  =  3 vs   Wits  = 1

Thanks Team – well done.

Chris

Overall result: Won 12 - 6

9th LEAGUE vs Edenvale

The team has come to grips with this three Boertjies and a Porra idea. No more high English speaking in our team, nee nee, blikse* en donde* with a Piri piri smaak, that’s us.

Game report.

A long trek to the East Rand it was, got lost, found our way, got confused, back on track and then eventually we got there. Sports grounds that boasts with rugby, soccer, evening volley ball, base ball, karate, you name it and it happens at Edenvale sports grounds.

Player 1 at position 1.

Chambers – Chris   = 3  vs   Edenvale–  Ge = 1

Chris was getting the heck of this winning his squash game. A Captain must do what a Captain must do. Climb in and take control.  Good clean shots in the first game, a bit of fight from the opponent but first game to the Captain. The second was more serious, Ge was losing face and his girlfriend was looking on, a tuff match with both hitting hard (the winter game has subsided). But the old man pulled out all the experience and won 16/14. He needed rest and playing half mast, conceded the third. The fourth was dealt with swiftly and the result was favourable.

Player 2 at position 2

Chambers –  Kobus  = 3  vs   Edenvale–  Riaan = 0

A demon possessed. Kobus was hungry and with no mercy demolished poor Riaan. The Captain of his team nogal.

Chambers --  Lesley  = 3  vs   Edenvale–  John = 1

Still  fighting to regain his position in the team (6 months probation for Porras) Leslie was in trouble after the first game down. This won’t do and after intensive tips from Kobus (haven’t a clue what language was used, with arms around the Porra in serious discussion) Leslie got back on court.  A ha, this is how I should do it, and with his usual zest and eagerness he was back in the game, running, boasting and even smashing. The next three games was his, thus securing his position in the (prestigious) 9^th Chambers league team. Well done Leslie. Horaa!!  

Player 4 at position 4

Chambers -- Willie  = 0   vs   Edenvale–  John = 3

Now Willies opponent wasn’t a small guy. In fact he was Biiiig. So getting the ball passed Joe was an impossibility. But Willie tried, he played well but gave it away in returning the serves. We will see more of Willie in future, I have no doubt.

End result   - Chambers  =  3 vs   Edenvale  = 1

Thanks Team – well done.

Chris

Overall result: Won 12 - 5

10th LEAGUE vs Soweto (2 weeks ago)

After taking 16 points from them in the first round when they failed to arrive on time, this was obviously a grudge match as they are second on the table by one or two points instead of top. As it turned out they were friendly but determined. They are actually playing in a league far weaker than they should be and we will not be playing them in future as they must move up a few leagues.

No 4 – Bob – On first and put up a better than expected show and had a good match. Lost 0-3. (Scored 23 points in total).

No 3 – Des – Next up and pretty much ditto on above. Des scored a 10 in the last game which made him happy. Lost 0-3. (Scored 26 points).

No 2 – John F – Came in as a late replacement for Johan M whose wife is not well and he wanted to leave early. It should be noted, Dear Reader that Johan was there and changed ready to play in the event that John F didn’t arrive. John was totally outclassed and was soon in the showers. Lost 0-3. (Scored 17 points).

No 1 – Brian – On last and played a very good player and did score a total of 9 points in his three games!

All over by eight o’clock and at least the showers were hot.

Put this behind us and had a very good burger washed down with some el cheapo red at JB’s in Melrose Arch on our own.

Overall result: Lost 0-16

Ladies 3rd LEAGUE vs Parkview

Joanne won 3-0

Heather lost 0-3 (beaten by a granny………but a granny by the name of Jean Grainger is no disgrace)

Fefi won 3-0

Julie won 3-0

Still undefeated

Overall result: 12 - 3

Ladies 4th LEAGUE 03 vs Edenvale

Josephine 3 – 2

Lynda     3 – 0

Kelly       1 – 3

Mandy    3 – 0 (welcome back Mandy)

Overall result: Won 12 - 5